First and foremost: Happy Birthday to Craig and Julia! I’m sorry I can’t be home with you guys to celebrate!
So my time here is already FLYING by! I can’t believe I’ve been here for 3 ½ weeks already and it’s already leaving me feel a little sceptical that 3 months is enough time... (don’t worry mom, I’ll still be coming home in August!) Things just move at a different speed here and with so many ideas and projects and things to see and do, I’m not sure it can all be accomplished in such a short amount of time-but try, I will!
I feel like I am quickly adjusting to my new home in Mochudi. I know the last time I wrote, I was panicking about just about everything, but now that I have had time to settle, it’s beginning to feel more like home. The family I live with is absolutely amazing – they are friendly, easy to talk to, welcoming and definitely go out of their way to make me feel comfortable, which is probably the reason I’m adjusting so well. There are still some things I’m getting used to though... since Mochudi is smaller, I stand out A LOT MORE than in Gabs. While walking around town, any child who sees me will most likely race to a safe distance from me and point at me shouting “White man! White man!” in Setswana. It caught me off guard at first, especially since I didn’t know if they were making fun of me or what, but I found out they are just excited to see me, so I simply shout back “Dumela!” and give them a thumbs up (thumbs up is REALLY big here!) Most seem to be getting used to be already. Another funny story, just on Saturday, Maryam and Spojmai came to Mochudi to visit me for the day and as we were waiting at the ATM, some people came up and starting video-taping/taking pictures of me. Again, it’s kind of awkward, but they are just excited to see me and it’s not doing me any harm.
The lack of hot water in the morning can be a little tough sometimes... trying to bath (not shower... I mean an awkward, small bath tub) is REALLY cold when you aren’t getting ANY hot water-not to mention the mornings here get pretty cold in themselves.
One thing that I am learning not to take for granted is electricity! In the past week, power has gone out 3 times. During the day, it isn’t so bad, but most often it goes out around 730pm, leaving it PITCH black. I am now a part of the protocol when this happens, and we all move carefully to find the lanterns and light them so we can make our way around the house. Just to prove I’m a sucker for technology, this is usually the time where I whip out my iPod and lay on my bed.
There is some extra attention which is more difficult to deal with, however. People associate being white with having power, connections, resources and most of all, money. On a typical day, walking through the core of Mochudi, I will indefinitely be stopped by at least 2 people who tell me their dreams, goals and current projects and assume that I will be able to solve all of their problems using the colour of skin. They ask for my phone number, my friend’s and family in Canada’s phone numbers, they want my Canadian address, my email address, and any other way they might possibly be able to contact me. They often try to tell/show me where they live and ask “So when will you come visit me?” They want me to take them to Canada where they are sure the job opportunities are endless and the pay is good. This can be not only frustrating since their perception of the western world is much out of line from reality, but it can also be extremely difficult to explain to them that I can’t help them.
One of my first nights walking home from work, a boy about my age followed me home. He explained to me that he was a good student and was looking for work but could not find any. He told me about how his mother and father beat him every night when he gets home and he showed me the scars as if he needed to prove it. He begged me to call his family and tell his parents that it is not right to beat him and that he is a decent boy. He pleaded for over 10 minutes with me, sure that my influence would make a difference, but for obvious reasons, I could not make the call. Finally, he resorted to asking me for money. I was unsure how to handle the situation, so finally I gave him a few pula, told him I was sorry, and went into my home as he stood there staring back.
I’m also beginning to accept that I will be harassed on the way home from work almost everyday. I have about a 5 minute walk from the bus stop to my home, and unfortunately, I have to pass a bar that is located right at the stop. Usually I am passing it somewhere between 5:30 and 6, just as the sun is going down. There will definitely be a few men around who have spent their day drinking and at least one of them ambitious enough to follow me home. Literally-I’ve been chased home! The other day, a man was quite determined to make me go to his house – he had a firm grip on my wrist and was trying to drag me down the side road... I managed to break free, though! Honestly, I don’t feel threatened by them, but they do try hard to get me to go to their house where they will beg me for money. They are never threatening, and usually they stumble enough that I don’t need to resist too much... but it definitely is awkward and unfortunate that it is becoming a part of my daily routine.
Stepping Stones is continuing to be great! I’ve included some pictures of the staff and some of the kids, with whom I am already building serious friendships with. Already, I’m finding myself in a catch – these students have been through so much and have so much baggage I almost feel it is unfair of me to let them open up and tell me their problems, their ambitions, their identity struggles and relationship problems etc, when I know I will be leaving them in such a short time. They have enough people coming into and out of their lives that I feel I need to protect them from me doing the same. On the same note, I have selfish reasons of my own for not getting too attached, as I know that will just make it harder to leave. But at the same time, I am here to be a support for the students... someone they can trust and confide in, look up to for guidance and be a mentor for them... it’s just a fine line that I need to avoid crossing so that I don’t end up making matters worse in the long run. Hmmm....
One exciting project I’ve already been able to be a part of is a house building project! I’ve included two pictures from this project, and in the group one, you can see Mma-Cilio in the middle sitting down. We built the house for her – a grandmother left raising her 4 grandchildren. It was an amazing feeling to be able to help her family. Myself and 16 other volunteers from Guelph built the 2-room home from scratch-we were involved in everything from mixing concrete to making mortar to laying bricks and filling in cracks. While looking at the family’s original home, a small, round mud hut with holes in the roof, no electricity, no in-house running water, no bathroom, etc - nothing but a single mattress and some pots - you truly realize not only how well some may have it, but also what a strong heart can do. Mma-Cilio and her family are happy regardless of their situation, and it was inspirational to see the determination in their eyes to make the best of their situation.
Anyways, I suppose that’s it for now... I just wanted to give you all an update and let you know I’m feeling much better about being here. Although I still think about home a lot, it is definitely much easier to deal with as now I understand WHY I’m here. I did miss the traditional May 24 long weekend in Southampton though—hope you guys had fun! Tomorrow is a holiday here, so I think I might be doing a 4 hour cultural walk through some villages with some co-workers and then head into Gabs to meet up with Maryam and Ruby!
Cheers,
Matt
Wow Matt... some interesting stories! Sounds like you've got a great handle on things... can't wait to read more.
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